If you’re reading this, I assume you’re either in the middle of a contentious divorce or have recently ended one. It’s a tough time in your life, and one that you’ll eventually grow out of, but it’s raw and unpleasant for now.
The fact that your ex-husband has a wandering eye and can’t seem to keep his hands to himself is one thing. The way he treats you isn’t something to be proud of and certainly doesn’t represent maturity. It’s a sexual addiction, however, that deserves your attention. That’s why I wrote this article. I want to help you deal with your ex-husband’s sexual addiction so that you can get back on your feet, divorce-free or married with a baby in tow.
Recognize The Addiction
The first step to dealing with an addiction is admitting you have one. It’s unlikely that your ex will ever see this article and read it, but it’s never too late to educate yourself about issues that may be affecting your life. It’s also the first step to changing your life for the better. If you’ve been carrying this burden for a long time and are finally ready to address it, here’s the perfect opportunity to do so. Get smart, get well, and get back on your feet.
Like other addictions, your ex’s sexual addiction is highly likely to reoccur. The fact that he’s been able to control it for the most part and hasn’t hurt you or your child shows that there’s still some good in him. It also means that, should you decide to work through this phase of your life together, you’ll both need to be on your guard to ensure the addiction doesn’t resurface. The most effective way of dealing with your ex’s addiction is by remaining vigilant and keeping in mind that nothing deserves to be treated lightly when it comes to a person’s health. Even if the worst seems unlikely, it’s never advisable to trust someone entirely until you know them better. The same goes for your ex. So, while I want to help you get through this messy period in your life, I also want to make sure you’re taking the necessary precautions to ensure the best possible outcome.
Determining Your Options
If your ex-husband is the kind of man who’ll never change and you feel there’s no chance of reconciliation, the only reasonable option left to you is to get a lawyer and put in the appropriate paperwork to end the marriage. That might not be what you want to do, however, as it’ll impact your life dramatically. If you have children with your ex, you might not want to uproot them from their home and move across the country, either. That’s a lot to handle, and it doesn’t guarantee that things will go smoothly. If you’re not willing to try and work things out, at least consider what’s available to you legally.
Consider Your Ex’s Mental Health Condition
It isn’t always easy to discern what’s going on in a person’s head, and I’m sure it’s even more difficult when it comes to someone you’re no longer married to. This is a man who, at this point, likely believes he has no other choice but to continue acting out to prove to you how much he cares. It would be naïve to think otherwise, and it’s probably best not to engage with him on any level until you can have a full conversation and he shows you the appropriate respect.
Take Your Time
This is advice I wish I could give you but don’t have the authority to. Your life will be dramatically improved once you manage to pull yourself out of this rut you’re in, and you don’t have to rush into anything. Take your time and do what needs to be done when you’re ready. You have all the information you need, and it’s up to you to make the right decision for your life and your family’s future. That’s the best gift you can give yourself right now—no rush, no pressure, just you, your truth, and what you need to do to move forward. You are powerful, and you deserve to be happy. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
Get Help
As I said at the beginning, this is a difficult time in your life. There’s no question that it’ll be messy and probably even painful. That’s why it’s so important that you’re seeking help from professionals who can guide you through this process and tell you what to expect. A good counselor should be able to help you work through this issue with your ex and advise you on the best route to take. It’s certainly a case of love/hate, but at least you’ll know where you stand and can decide whether or not to proceed. Don’t hesitate to reach out for help should you need it. It’s better to be safe than sorry.
In summary, while it’s never easy to become acquainted with or deal with an ex, it is possible. You’re entitled to feel angry, hurt, and betrayed, but you’re also entitled to move on and be happy. As I said at the begining, it’s important to remember that you’re stronger than you think you are, and it’s never too late to improve your life. You’re an extraordinary woman, and I wish you all the best should you decide to seek a divorce or work things out with your ex. You’ll both be better off for it.